Sunday, 23 February 2014

Reading The Dead... Free For Reviews


If crime thrillers with a comedic and supernatural twist sounds like your thing, send me an email at jc8802@nb.sympatico.ca if you're interested in receiving free copies of the first and second books of READING THE DEAD - THE SARAH MILTON CHRONICLES, as well as a companion novella, in exchange for honest reviews on Goodreads and Amazon (and anywhere else you'd care to post).

Sorry, but I can't gift books from Canada. You must be able to receive Kindle .mobi or Kobo .epub versions by email.


This is on the honor system, so if you're not serious about providing a review for the books, please don't try to take advantage of my good nature, or I won't be providing such offers in the future...



Monday, 17 February 2014

...and now for something Completely Different!

Tips On Surviving The Zombie Apocalypse

by the writers of AMC's The Walking Dead*

*or some random guy who isn't affiliated with the show at all... 

 

1. Whenever possible, be sure to travel through dark, dense forests with the noisiest, most incapable individual on the planet. Give this person a loaded gun, saving only a pocket knife for yourself. This will come in handy for digging your own grave while your companion howls in fright and ineffectually empties their magazine into the air in the face of a zombie horde.

2. Collect as many babies as you can and carry them with you at all times. A crying baby is zombie kryptonite. If babies aren't available, then find a hair stylist who'll give you dreadlocks. This not only makes you invisible, but unlike covering yourself in dead guts, it's waterproof! And a baby with a dreadlock? You're golden!



3. Zombies got you pinned down? Don't have a molotov cocktail to throw at a wrecked car for a distraction? Try spraying some water in their faces. Zombies hate this more than cats do!





4. While foraging for supplies, be sure to stock up on all those little knicknacks that you'll find kicking around abandoned homes. Who needs weapons and ammo, when you can simply distract a zombie by tossing snowglobes at it?




5. Impressed with your ability to trap a live zombie in an enclosed space, without harming it in the slightest? Tag your victories with some butt-kicking, post-apocalyptic graffiti! But whatever you do, don't pick up those scissors and try to finish it off. Fooling those cunning dead people with your razor-sharp wits is half the battle!



6. Never trust anyone brave enough to fight for another's safety. Hanging around with them will only get you killed. Better to simply shoot them in the head first and put them out of their inevitable misery, or if that's too difficult, let a child do it for you. Most young people are refreshingly homicidal, once you take away their video games and cell phones.


7. Always, always, always... run backwards! Everyone knows that zombies can't get you, as long as you're looking them in the eyes.






8. Zombies have notoriously bad eyesight, no sense of smell, and really poor hearing. As long as you don't stick your neck, arm or leg anywhere near their mouths, you should be fine.





9. Always travel in a crowd. That way, the zombie horde that your noisy friends will invariably attract will become completely disoriented at the sight of everyone running off in different directions.




10. Learn how to use a crossbow, or any kind of Japanese weapon. You're pretty much just screwed if you don't. Don't question it.






Watch The Walking Dead on AMC for more invaluable tips on how to stay off the menu during the zombie apocalypse!


Saturday, 8 February 2014

Donate For Your Reading Pleasure!

Now's your chance to read for a good cause!

West Virginian author, Patrick J Russell, a staunch supported of indie artists and their crowdfunding campaigns, needs our support, after he was evicted from his home. 

Visit his fundraising cause now at http://www.gofundme.com/60q254 and among the many great items your donations will earn are one of five copies of the complete published set of Reading The Dead - The Sarah Milton Chronicles, a $9 value.

That's...
Book 1: Reading The Dead - The Sarah Milton Chronicles
Book 2: Reading The Dead: Fidelis In Aeternum
and the book 2 companion novella, Anna's Adventures

If you were planning on buying these books anyway, why not donate your money where it's needed the most?


Saturday, 1 February 2014

ANNA'S ADVENTURES

Companion novella to FIDELIS IN AETERNUM, the second volume of the Reading The Dead - The Sarah Milton Chronicles series, containing two standalone Anna Nigma adventures that's sure to please!

ANNA'S BRUSH WITH LIFE
As LAPD Officer Sarah Milton and her partners close in on the Fancy Dress Killer, none of them realize that a certain invisible hitchhiker is along for the ride. It's a good thing she is, because when the unpredictable Harry Sands gets the upper hand, the surprising intervention of Sarah's ghostly companion turns out to be her only chance for survival.

HAPPILY EVER AFTERLIFE
Sarah's back in Tilford to attend her father's wedding, and guess who's along for the fun? Unknown to the guests, a pair of would-be robbers have picked this moment to rob the house. The hapless bandits planned on everything, except facing off against the poltergeist queen of pranks.

Free preview on Instafreebie:
https://instafreebie.com/free/6c9WM


Amazon Kindle:


Smashwords:

READING THE DEAD: FIDELIS IN AETERNUM

The second volume of the Reading The Dead - The Sarah Milton Chronicles series.

A frantic phone call from the wife of her former partner plunges LAPD police detective Sarah Milton and her teenage poltergeist sidekick, Anna Nigma, into a deadly mystery involving one of their most dangerous foes, the convicted "Fancy Dress Killer," Harry Sands. The Violent Crimes Unit is in the hotseat to find the copycat serial killer responsible for a recent string of murders plaguing the city, leaving Sarah scrambling to understand the bizarre, otherworldly aspects to this latest murder spree.

Enemies from her past conspire with a new, even deadlier foe, in a thrilling adventure that threatens not only her life, but also the fate of those she holds dear, culminating in a supernatural showdown against an evil entity that ultimately tests the limits of her faith and courage.

Be sure to also read ANNA'S ADVENTURES, the companion novella to this book, featuring two standalone tales with the teenage poltergeist, Anna Nigma.

Free preview on Instafreebie:
https://instafreebie.com/free/sOQKr


Amazon Kindle:

Trade Paperback (includes "Anna's Adventures"):
Createspace: https://www.createspace.com/5454984
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/dp/151187421X

Smashwords: